Garden Snobs

There are a group of people that I think of as garden snobs.  They’re not the ones that continue to wear flowered hats and white gloves in the garden – those people are garden lovelies.  These are the gardeners that bore you to death with their “knowledge” for no other reason than to point out that they know a lot about gardening.

I’m talking about the snob who has found a new source of information and simply must share it with everyone all the time.  S/He imposes on your quiet times by bouncing around with facts much the same as Roo in Winnie the Pooh saying, “Look at me.  See what I’ve learned.”

I’m talking about the snob who tells you things for the fourth or fifth time but is still sure that you’ve never heard this information before or that you’re a slow learner and need to have every point reinforced. “Did you know that the geranium you have in your front garden is not a geranium at all.  Did you, huh?”

I’m talking about the snob who knows the correct way to accomplish a gardening task even though there are at least four other ways to accomplish the same thing.  “Double-digging is the only way to prepare a new garden.”

I’m talking about the snob that makes a point of correcting you on points of botanical nomenclature in front of others -- despite the fact that they jumped into the conversation in the middle and are most decidedly wrong!  “The plant you are talking about is most certainly Campanula lactiflora!” when everyone in the group knows that it is the dratted Lady Bells (Campanula rapunculoides) and no one cares about the name, anyway.  They just want to get rid of the damned things.

I’m waiting for those snobs to mellow into kinder, gentler, calmer gardeners.

Drat, I think I’m talking about myself!